Friday, April 13, 2007

FRIDAY FUNNY PAGES: Found humor from the daily news

In today's Los Angeles Times, all-things-Marine-Corps reporter Tony Perry gets with the dolphin-and-pony show the Navy's marine mammal operation has been flogging to the newsmedia.

"We have the bestest jobs in the world," say the Navy handlers, in a manner of speaking, for "007 With a Snout?"

Could be!

The navy is trying to end the "scuttlebutt" that its dolphins are "007's" with a license to kill.

"Fantasy is more interesting than reality," says one marine scientist.

"On Thursday, navy officials allowed a rare glimpse into the training of Ten and 84 other dolphins and 25 California sea lions..." writes Perry.

Rare glimpse, in this case, meaning every time the Navy wishes to sell Zak or Ten or someone else as defenders against al Qaeda frogmen (the ones that don't exist) thinking of approaching ballistic missile submarines in home port, to newsmen.

"Officials warn reporters not to believe what they may have read in foreign newspapers or on various websites," it is said.


Sacco and Vanzetti -- for free
Hmmm, watch these guys interview themselves or Ultimate Fighting on Spike?

"[On PBS], there is The Brotherhood in which Newsweek investigative reporters Mark Hosenball and Michael Isikoff interview each other about their investigation as they investigate The Muslim Brotherhood's terrorist ties ... " writes someone at the Los Angeles Times.

The word investigate is used three times in one sentence so readers know Hosenball and Isikoff are top masturbators investigators.

Hey, we didn't get Osama bin Laden, but we got some guy named Christopher Paul of Columbus, Ohio, for being in Peshawar and Afghanistan in 1991.

He also "recently researched ... flight simulator computer programs," reported the Washington Post.

Uh-oh! UH-OH!!


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