THANKSGIVING ADVICE FROM THE BIG SCOUNDREL: Phony sincerity -- annoying vice or good habit?
"In a reflective mood as he looks toward his final year in office, President Bush delivered his first official Thanksgiving speech Monday, urging Americans to 'show their thanks by giving back' and to remember that 'our nation’s greatest strength is the decency and compassion of our people,' " reported Sheryl Gay Stolberg of the New York Times here.
How does one sit still when the biggest scoundrel delivers platitudes and admonitions for altruism no decent person would believe are sincere.
Answer: It's a job.
And no speech would be complete without drawing attention to our obligations, of which there are always many.
"After recounting [some crap story about English settlers in Virginia fit for a class of elementary school kids] Mr. Bush ticked off the reasons Americans had to be thankful, including 'farmers and ranchers who provide us with abundant food,' 'entrepreneurs who create new jobs' and 'devoted teachers who prepare our children for the opportunities of tomorrow.'"
"Mr. Bush went on to praise 'Americans who serve a cause larger than themselves,' not only the military but also people like Liviu Librescu, the Virginia Tech professor who died this spring blocking a gunman from entering his classroom, and Jeremy Hernandez, who broke open the back door of a school bus to lead children to safety in August when the Minneapolis bridge they were traveling on collapsed."
These constitute the usual knee-jerk Lenny Skutnick citations.
Personalized example: And we can take as a beacon the giving heart of Dick Destiny who just last Thanksgiving took in a homeless kitten and personally hand fed two mockingbird chicks that had fallen out of their nest in spring until they could safely fly away. Forgive him for he could not find an opportunity to give up his life for someone else this year but maybe in 2008 something will present itself.
"By contrast, Mr. Bush on Monday asked Americans to consider the 'many ways to spread hope this holiday: volunteer in a shelter, mentor a child, help an elderly neighbor, say thanks to one who wears the nation’s uniform.' ”
Always honor the troops. Twice a day if possible.
OK, here's the thing.
DD has never believed the men and women who wear our nation's uniform are fighting in Iraq to preserve his freedom to be a jerk in print. Here's a good resolution to make, anytime of the year, not just for Thanksgiving: If you think that, stop.
GWB, like many people you only listen to because you have to or because the media waves them under your nose everyday, is quick with the advice. In this way, he is reminiscent of my mother, back in Pine Grove, Pennsylvania, before she lost her mind and was put in home.
Here were some "greatest hits," familiar to anyone stuck in front of a similar parent or someone alleged to be deserving of respect:
"Eat your peas." Delivered at a meal made unpalatable by some explosion at the table for some imagined transgression.
"Eat your Brussel sprouts." Delivered before the kitchen timer was set to five minutes, after which, if the plate was not empty, you were given the strap.
"Don't you know children are starving in Korea?" Delivered sometime between "eat your peas and "eat your Brussel sprouts."
"This is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you." Delivered after the kitchen timer expired.
"Come out of your room and don't make me tell you again." Delivered after fifteen minutes of everyone in the extended family hating on each other just before Thanksgiving dinner in Pine Grove.
"Get your nose out of that book and come out of your room." Delivered after escaping from the Thanksgiving dinner table.
"Who wants to say 'grace'?" Delivered by the person who viewed belief as an attendance contest, one in which the more Sunday masses attended, the more likely one was to ascend to Heaven.
"There but for the grace of God, go thou." Delivered right before a punishment for committing no crime.
"Shut your mouth!" Delivered five to ten times a day, extra on holidays, as needed.
"I told you to shut your mouth!" Delivered just after being struck but just before sitting down to Thanksgiving dinner.
"In a reflective mood as he looks toward his final year in office, President Bush delivered his first official Thanksgiving speech Monday, urging Americans to 'show their thanks by giving back' and to remember that 'our nation’s greatest strength is the decency and compassion of our people,' " reported Sheryl Gay Stolberg of the New York Times here.
How does one sit still when the biggest scoundrel delivers platitudes and admonitions for altruism no decent person would believe are sincere.
Answer: It's a job.
And no speech would be complete without drawing attention to our obligations, of which there are always many.
"After recounting [some crap story about English settlers in Virginia fit for a class of elementary school kids] Mr. Bush ticked off the reasons Americans had to be thankful, including 'farmers and ranchers who provide us with abundant food,' 'entrepreneurs who create new jobs' and 'devoted teachers who prepare our children for the opportunities of tomorrow.'"
"Mr. Bush went on to praise 'Americans who serve a cause larger than themselves,' not only the military but also people like Liviu Librescu, the Virginia Tech professor who died this spring blocking a gunman from entering his classroom, and Jeremy Hernandez, who broke open the back door of a school bus to lead children to safety in August when the Minneapolis bridge they were traveling on collapsed."
These constitute the usual knee-jerk Lenny Skutnick citations.
Personalized example: And we can take as a beacon the giving heart of Dick Destiny who just last Thanksgiving took in a homeless kitten and personally hand fed two mockingbird chicks that had fallen out of their nest in spring until they could safely fly away. Forgive him for he could not find an opportunity to give up his life for someone else this year but maybe in 2008 something will present itself.
"By contrast, Mr. Bush on Monday asked Americans to consider the 'many ways to spread hope this holiday: volunteer in a shelter, mentor a child, help an elderly neighbor, say thanks to one who wears the nation’s uniform.' ”
Always honor the troops. Twice a day if possible.
OK, here's the thing.
DD has never believed the men and women who wear our nation's uniform are fighting in Iraq to preserve his freedom to be a jerk in print. Here's a good resolution to make, anytime of the year, not just for Thanksgiving: If you think that, stop.
GWB, like many people you only listen to because you have to or because the media waves them under your nose everyday, is quick with the advice. In this way, he is reminiscent of my mother, back in Pine Grove, Pennsylvania, before she lost her mind and was put in home.
Here were some "greatest hits," familiar to anyone stuck in front of a similar parent or someone alleged to be deserving of respect:
"Eat your peas." Delivered at a meal made unpalatable by some explosion at the table for some imagined transgression.
"Eat your Brussel sprouts." Delivered before the kitchen timer was set to five minutes, after which, if the plate was not empty, you were given the strap.
"Don't you know children are starving in Korea?" Delivered sometime between "eat your peas and "eat your Brussel sprouts."
"This is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you." Delivered after the kitchen timer expired.
"Come out of your room and don't make me tell you again." Delivered after fifteen minutes of everyone in the extended family hating on each other just before Thanksgiving dinner in Pine Grove.
"Get your nose out of that book and come out of your room." Delivered after escaping from the Thanksgiving dinner table.
"Who wants to say 'grace'?" Delivered by the person who viewed belief as an attendance contest, one in which the more Sunday masses attended, the more likely one was to ascend to Heaven.
"There but for the grace of God, go thou." Delivered right before a punishment for committing no crime.
"Shut your mouth!" Delivered five to ten times a day, extra on holidays, as needed.
"I told you to shut your mouth!" Delivered just after being struck but just before sitting down to Thanksgiving dinner.
posted by George Smith at 2:20 PM
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