Thursday, March 19, 2009

BIOTERROR HAGFISH


Get yer degree in handcuffing and detention, homemade cures,
bioterror detectors, and lessons on how to save yourself from
things that'll never happen in your neighborhood.


DD has regularly commented on the industries aiming for solid growth when everyone else has fallen on hard times. You're looking at these hagfish, streamed out down the page in Google ads next to DD's news feed on bioterrorism.

Teaching and training in how to detain and handcuff illegal aliens, the homeless or anyone else who looks suspicious. How to use scanning equipment, wear night vision goggles, interpret intelligence badly and write sclerotic opinion pieces on emerging threats no one else is quite able to see. Selling bioterror detectors to the police forces of the Pine Grove Pennsyvanias of the country, any town out in the forest with a population of about 2,500. So, like, they're safe from bioterrorism. The kind that no one attacked us with except the crazy angry US biodefense researcher from Fort Detrick. Development of robots drones to launch pinprick assassinations of scruffy-looking strangers around the world, possibly people just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Anything, really, that advertises it will protect you while giving nothing back to the welfare and growth of general society.

As one vision of the future, it could be solid.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

''Hi, His Bag of Terror

Spot on.

Your lucid commentary applies to any group offering to provide negative life support teams using weapons of mass disinformation.

There remain, however, other worthy souls that have a true apocalyptic vision, soundly based on real experiences with the growing madness - ranging from the benignly stupid 'condoms kill by encouraging more sex' Pope through to the antics of the sanest madman of this era: Osama bin Ladin.

Ex military should be better regarded in all civilized society after 'they' have sought to dig us out of holes created by warring politicians and 'freedom fighter' madmen [ aka wannna be politicians]. So, if to survive they are driven to offering handicraft classes in handcuffing by numbers using biodegradable renewable resources -'bit of hemp rope'- because that's all the work they can get , then maybe ''we, the people'' need a real good kick in the ass.

Perhaps, if the creepy reporters spent less time 'creating' news out of not much at all, and more time editing their stories down to 100 words sans self-opinionated conclusions, there would be less scare mongering drivel printed and broadcast to encourage the growth of Monty Python security classes. Then make it mandatory that our honorable ex military people get first shot at all decent security related jobs instead of paying criminals and ‘handcuff class’ failures to ‘police’ airports, seaports, train stations etc….

Garage sales should be front page news and Osama and the Pope could handily be relegated to inside page 47 in really small print so that we all get annoyed and stop reading about the latest barely reported bomb outrage or huge increase in HIV infected babies.. Perhaps they would both fade to black without the daily dose of infamy on the
boobtube…Then we can sort out the Bankers, Financial Advisors, Accountants, Lawyers, Banking Regulators….

Meantime , I have to go to my opinion forming classes with optional handcuffing..''

Crater B Aiter

1:43 PM  

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