WET NOODLE HACK-ROCK AND A GOOD GRIMACE: Rockstar Supernova staggers on

The first thing that comes to mind after watching the wrap-up of mostly wet-noodle hack-rock on tonight's Rock Star: Supernova is: If people can vote as many times as they like for any contestant, why isn't there a slot for voting to send everyone home?

It's rhetorical. There'd be no show. A crew of wiseacres would find a way to use it to derail this limp game.

The band was not rocking, as usual. Early in the show everyone stood around while some lame nob turned in a James Taylor-ized version of a Nirvana tune, a band none of the Supernova ex-rock star Tuesday-night-TV-stars would be expected to like much, anyway. The crowd cheered because it would cheer a plateful of singing maggots.

At one point there was a promise from one of the contestants, distinguishable from the rest by an Australian accent, that -- next week -- "the crap" would be rocked out of it." Next week?

During the broadcast the camera lit on judge Dave Navarro for a second, showing him slumped over, head down on arm, before darting away.

Jason Newsted was much less the ersatz USMC D.I. But he had to get onstage, grimace and ram into the designated singer, who got extra points for not losing it, during a random metal treatment of the Jefferson Airplane's "White Rabbit." Newsted's still the most hard man in the place, superb with the grimace, much like Bill Shatner was early in his career. You know you want to head butt someone, Jayson, so just do it and leave them bloody.

The so-called super-house band tried out Creedence Clearwater Revival's "Fortunate Son" and delivered none of the descending slash of the original's Fogerty-propelled riff. So the singer was shelled for being stiff. And at one point, during the bar-band anthem of the early 70's, Free's "All Right Now," it sounded like the drummer was trying to stuff double-bass drum rolls into the turnarounds.

One girl took on a Helen Reddy-look and sound and was rewarded for the sheer stupefaction factor. And the telecast was closed by 90-seconds of sturm-and-drang from a lady with the look of the wicked witch of the west.

One of the fundamental problems of the show is the poor selection of material for what amounts to a hard rock jukebox. As with last season's show, at some point they will record a CD of select performances.

Now, hard rock jukebox hits performed by ringers can be fun. But the song selection for Supernova is either poor, poorly matched to performer, somewhat poorly performed by both contestants and hack support band, or a weak tea of all of it.

The members of Supernova come from hard rock and metal -- late-70's to early 90's style -- and all that broad style entails. That means power metal, some heavy blooz rock by bands which charted but few remember now, AC/DC, Black Sabbath/Ozzy, arena boogie and southern rock.

And the show brings little of it, with the small part that is thematically right performed with none of the original vigor, that not entirely being the the fault of contestants who don't identify with the music.