Wednesday, December 06, 2006

THE CRACKPOT: Electromagnetic pulse doom lobbyist to reverse global warming with really long soot hose

Electromagnetic pulse doom lobbyist Lowell Wood, also well known as a national labs nuclear weapons scientist, was characterized as a man with the plan to save the world from global warming in a recent issue of Rolling Stone.

Wood has a richly deserved reputation as a crackpot stemming from regular appearances as leading member of the EMP lobby. Rolling Stone magazine writes gamely of his interests, noting "Wood is infamous for championing fringe science, from X-ray lasers to cold-fusion nuclear reactors . . . "

Threat advocacy has also been his bag, Wood being one of the knee-jerk practitioners of the American national security way of finding theoretical enemies and then telling the government what to do about them on the taxpayer's dime. And that's worked superbly in the war on terror.

Dubbing Wood "Dr. Evil," which gives the man a little too much comedy credit at this juncture, Rolling Stone describes him further:
"With the Soviet Union gone, he needed a new enemy to fight, one that came with federal funding attached. Lately, terrorism has fit the bill. 'Threats are my business,' he says. 'I help the government figure out who can kill us, and how, and when.' Although officially retired . . . he also chaired a congressional commission that investigated the risk of attack from an electromagnetic pulse bomb -- basically, a nuke that explodes at high altitude, leaving people unharmed but disabling every power line and computer and electrical device in the country."

Wood's plan is to put hundreds of thousands of tons of aluminum powder or sulfurous soots into the high atmosphere above the arctic ice cap. This will be done by either dropping bags of it out of a fleet of 747s or by shooting the soot up a fifteen mile high giant Kevlar garden hose attached to a burner on the ground.

Soot and a hose! Like a volcanic eruption. Who knew? Of course, it must be right [eyes roll for dramatic effect] because Wood figured it out using computer modelling. However, DD reckons other than the one or two exceptions to the rule mentioned in the Stone -- they're known as "geoengineers" -- very few boffins are jumping to ride the soot bandwagon into the future of world history.

With GlobalSecurity.Org Senior Fellow T-shirt on, it is difficult to divine how seriously Wood is taken by anyone in a position to actually get things done. On the basis of his work as part of the electromagnetic pulse lobby, a judgment can be made that very few people take him seriously who aren't compelled by job description or bribedpaid to do so. However, Wood makes great copy as a larger-than-life character from the world of secret weapons lab science, a Haystacks Calhoun of thermonuclear weapons so to speak, and as a curiosity in a pop culture magazine he appears to be right where he belongs.

Next year: Dr. Ironbeard makes the lame to see and the blind to walk.

"It is widely-known that we Americans contemplated, briefly and in a non-pervasive fashion, a nuclear EMP laydown on Iraq (a NPT signatory legally entitled to immunity from all nuclear attacks) as an exceptionally high-effectiveness commencement to Operation Desert Storm - and that two-thirds of the American people polled on the subject in that season supported the taking of such steps to protect the lives of American troops." -- Lowell Wood, EMP lobby-man, at FAS.


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